by Hugh G. Rection
My first sensation, on touching the SENSO® Pocket GalTM is a flashback to childhood, like a dead Frenchman eating cakes, only mine is tactile rather than gustatory: did your mother ever buy you, or did you perhaps acquire in a box of Corn POPS a ‘toy’ – that is, a childhood toy, for actual children, of no immediately obvious profane adult usage, though I’m sure if we thought about it enough… - a toy that was shaped like an octopus, made out of some weirdly sticky, incredibly unnatural, slightly queasy kind of rubber, which if you threw it at the wall it would stick and then descend, spastically, did you r mother 
every buy you one of those? Well mine did, and I got it in the Corn POPS to boot. A little googling reveals that it was called the Wacky Wall Walker, and while I hadn’t realized that I’d stored a deep, immediately recallable sense memory of the things, the SENSO® Pocket GalTM has, at long last, ended my search for things past. (I’d also forgotten how the cereal is ejaculated from the O in POPS in that commercial, and the whole now somewhat creepy ecstatic/borderline orgasmic gestalt of all the children in that commercial (plus what’s with the gymnast at the beginning?) but while I also immediately recognized it as soon as it flickered into action on youtube, it did not carry the same sens de nostalgie profond. Que sera. Also, for those of you who do remember, you may recall that as soon as they hit the floor the Wacky Wall Walkers were ungodly magnets for every stray bit of fuzz, dirt, hair, crumb, rodent dropping, or speck of general detritus there was – I can assure you the Pocket GalTM is no different, take care that it not come into contact with the ground, though unlike the WWW it has thus far not lost its magical properties despite repeated washings.)
The SENSO® Pocket GalTM is so named because, the packing alleges, it has “the sensual shape and feel of pussy lips and a warm vagina”, a charming description to be sure. While this reviewer has only a passing acquaintance with real-life pussy lips, rather preferring the relevant portions of the male anatomy in these matters, he has had sufficient experience, knowledge of gross anatomy, exposure to art history, and memories of adolescent perusals of gynocentric pornography to know that the SENSO®TM Pocket Gal does not very closely resemble the female form per se, but rather that of a Georgia O’Keeffe abstract. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
But enough of aesthetics, let us to matters onanistic. Uncanny and maternally fraught evocations of childhood and modern art aside, the Pocket Gal is admirably capable of delivering flattering stimulations to the erect male member. Well, mine anyway. A few tips as to usage:
1. The lube that is included, despite its claim to “Superior Lubricity” is really not that great, requiring reapplication every five minutes or so. Indeed, the design of the Pocket Gal makes the whole of issue of lube rather problematic. The thing is far too tight and clingy to go without, unless you really, really enjoy chaffing. But because it’s only long enough to encompass three or so inches of cock, with any excess cock protruding out the top, and as one’s natural inclination is to run it up and down the entire length of cock, a significant quantity of lube winds up running out the bottom, with a lesser portion frothing up and over the rim. I found JO Premium worked well, though as a silicone based lube it is theoretically degrading the silicone of the Pocket Gal itself. And beware of getting any lube on the outer surface or your hand, silicone lube on a silicone substance is so slippery as to invite slapstick, like a banana peel on a sidewalk in a physical comedy routine, only in your crotch.
2. This may be personal idiosyncrasy, but I’ve found this thing to be much better for edging than for cumming. It provides sufficient stimulation to keep me going, and even gets me right to the point of orgasm in a quite pleasurable, even nearly unbearable way. But the couple of times I used it to get all the way off were unsatisfying, insufficient even. Laying down with it on the cock and then humping a hand, mattress, or whoever could be talked into staying more or less in place solved this problem. Though not neatly. No, it was a rather messy solution all around.
3. The combination of (1) and (2), that is, the problems of lubrication, the expanse of unengulfed cock, and the disposition towards edging make the specter of chaffing alluded to in (1) all too plausible. Because the thing is “pussy lips” at one end and open at the other, and elastically tight, the far end tends to hesitate n the coronal sulcus before sliding up and over the corona glandis and onto the glans proper. While this is not without its pleasures, I’d advise regular users to be on guard against the possibility of progressing irritation.
All in all, the SENSO® Pocket GalTM is consistently more fun than most of the dates I’ve been on. Though, granted, that may be damning with faint praise.
